Metaphors

I could not find an official metaphor. However, our unofficial metaphor is that we are a family. I do talk about our school as having a family atmosphere. Teachers and staff also seem to see it as a familial structure. Some days I think this is a very appropriate metaphor. At times I feel like a parent, especially when I have to correct someone about something they should already know. At other times when I am corrected by people at central office, I feel like the child. Last year one of the best and longest serving teachers at school developed terminal cancer. She was in her early 40s with two children in 5th and 8th grades. It was a long drawn out struggle that lasted about 9 months. Most of the time this teacher was completely incapacitated and could do nothing for herself or her family. Our school family pitched in everyone made meals, shuttled kids, cleaned house etc. Right before Christmas we went over to her house and decorated it for the holidays and had food and drinks. She was in pain but able to enjoy seeing everyone. This was the last time we were all together before things became too bad. I don't know if it takes a crisis like that to really have people function like a family. After Christmas a bunch of us went over and put everything up. We all sat together at the funeral. During this experience we really did function like a family. If the teacher had not been such a positive presence I wonder if the same things would have transpired? As the school leader, I sometimes feel excluded because in the metaphor of family, I still have to evaluate and sometimes those evaluations are not glowing. It is hard for some teachers to take constructive criticism and still see the school personnel, especially leadership, as a family. I also think it is hard when leadership has a family approach to necessarily critique what needs to be critiqued because when we have positive relationships with people we try to avoid hurting their feelings. That was one of the good things about having an assistant principal. She would point out to me when she thought I was letting the familial nature of the relationship get in the way of what needed to be said. Without an assistant principal this year, it will be much more difficult for me to have that additional perspective. Staff members can get fussy with one another just like siblings. I look at lesson plans weekly like I do my children's homework. Positive reinforcement is used with staff as must of us with children have tried it with their childre. I try to recognize and heap praise on those who go the extra mile hopefully to spur all of them on.It is a fine line before between being professionally constructive and being too familial. A better metaphor would be we are all pieces of the same puzzle. We are all different shapes and we all have different strengths and responsibilities. However, this metaphor is not as warm and fuzzy. As a female elementary school leader, I think we like the warm and fuzzy. The puzzle metaphor may be better for a business or higher organizations of education. What the most important thing is regardless is building relationships with people built on trust and mutual respect.